The Extended Steam Salon

[Honeybell]

*motions to the cigarette girl, "Pack of Camel wide lights, please."*

*Lights one and begins smoking leisurely.  "Miss, when does the piano player arrive?  I have a request for him."

[The Abiliegh]

*motions to the cigarette girl, "Pack of Camel wide lights, please."*

*Lights one and begins smoking leisurely.  "Miss, when does the piano player arrive?  I have a request for him."

Looking over, she smiles at the smoking woman. "He'll be in when he gets here. My ship ain't run very tight, I'll confess. But he's worth it." She pauses, glancing back to her nearer customer to see if she is ready to order. Getting no reponse yet, she returns her attention. "But what are you looking to hear, doll? I might be able to oblidge in some manner or another."

[Honeybell]

Miss, I'm in deep for 'A Nightingale Sang in Berkley Square'.  Nursing a tired heart is difficult without the appropriate music and why spend a lonely, foggy, day outside?  Here, the atmosphere is good, the company is good, and makes me forget for a little while. *Crosses legs, and takes another draw on the cigarette.*  In all this big world, with so many people, why is it so difficult to find anyone to commiserate with?  That's I guess what brought me in Ma'am.

[The Abiliegh]

"That can be arranged." She smiled, then turned back to the woman at the bar. "Let me know what you decide on, love. Or, let Clark serve you a drink...." She opened a closet door behind the bar, poked around at something in the dark of the small room, and a whirring sound could be heard, followed shortly by a few metalic clanks. As she moved out of the closet, she was followed by a sleek, but obviously battered, clockwork bartender. "He makes em stiff, so be careful, doll." She winked, and let Clark work.

She passed by Mr. Gunn as she moved to exit the bar. She gave him a sly look that made it abundantly clear that she hadn't forgotten about him, and headed over to an impressive looking victrola. She browsed through a few records, and pulled out what she was looking for. Soon the song was playing; a rather charming version sung by Vera Lynn.

She patted the smoking wowan on the shoulder. "I hope this suits for ya, dear. Let me know if you need anything." Her voice was warm as she spoke.

[Honeybell]

"Perfect, love," she replied.  "Now to the matter of a drink, Clark, be a dear and give me a bourbon, neat."

Surveying the dim interior of the airship, she exclaimed, "My, but it is quiet in here today.  Gives a lady a chance to rest and think, although I've done a little bit much of the thinking part lately."

[The Abiliegh]

She watched Clark a moment, to make sure he got the drink order, and in moments he was whirring away, the drink made on the machine behind the bar in moment. He slid it down the bar, towards Mrs. Cross.

Taking the drink, she delievered it to the woman. "Well, you're welcome to enjoy yourself here til they tell me I've got to close the joint up. And enjoy the quiet while you've got it. The place will liven up, if every night for the past few years I've been running the gig have anythign to say towards the trend."

[Honeybell]

The woman took the drink and said, "Thanks, that's just what I needed.  My name's Honey by the way, or at least that's what everyone calls me.  The quiet is good for now, but what I really need is a distraction..."  Letting the sentence trail off, she scanned the room for said 'distraction', sighed, and turned back to the bar. 

"Let them trickle in, and perhaps there will be too many of us here for the authorities.  By the way, the liquor selection here is wonderful.  Reminds me of another joint in another time."

[The Abiliegh]

"Mrs. Cross, love. Pleasure to have ya." She followed Honey's gaze around the bar with a small reflective smile. "I'm not sure where he got off to, but there is a fella round here who might prove your type of distraction.."

She didn't see her brother around, but he knew where the exits were, and wasd fond of slippin out unnoticed. "I'll send him your way when he's back. He'll treat ya right for an evenin."

[Sgt.Major Thistlewaite]

Tommy watched the elegant Mrs. Cross glide across the room, seeing to the needs of her various customers. Standing while he finished his drink, he took a seat at the bar, and sat the empty in front of him, placing a folded fiver under the edge of the glass. Sitting at the bar was an old and thoroughly ingrained habit-with his back to the room, and without being obvious about it, he could watch the whole joint in the backbar mirror. Mrs. Cross went into a back room at the end off the long bar, and a moment later the strangest contraption Tommy'd ever seen emerged..a clockwork barkeep! He'd heard of 'em, but this was the first one he'd ever seen. He watched the machine as it made a couple of drinks...it seemed to know its way around. T.E. wore a heavy gold ring on the middle finger of his right hand, an old Police Academy ring, and he tapped it sharply on the rim of the empty glass, producing an audible *ching!* The clockwork barkeep's head swiveled toward the sound, and he whirred smoothly over to Tommy. "Freshen that up, Sir?" the automaton asked in a slightly tinny voice. "Sure thing, buddy," said Tommy, impressed. The robot took the empty and the fiver, and returned a moment later with a full glass and the change, depositing them smoothly in front of T.E. without spilling a drop. "Man, this is some joint!" thought Tommy to himself. "Glad I stopped in..."

[Honeybell]

Nodding in appreciation to Miss Cross, Honey lounged back and enjoyed the drink and the music.

[Honeybell]

"Oh, Miss Cross, the word on the street is that you'll be out for the weekend.  Will Clark be minding the bar or will the ship shut down for the weekend?"  Honey wondered aloud and began mourning a weekend missing the company of new friends.  Of course, it was rare Honey met someone she didn't like, even when she should.

[The Abiliegh]

"Mrs, love, and I'm out most weekends. Clark handles things pretty well, and I'm generally able to rope someone else into mindin the place while I'm away. Girl has got to have her downtime, after all." She smiled. "If you like it here, we're certainly not going to turn you away."

She returned to the bar and made herself another drink. She glanced up at the clock while she worked, wondering if she should start a little entertainment herself. Vinny and his newest little skirt would be in soon, and she never likeld to intterupt their gig. The crowd always seemed to like em enough, anyways.

"So, Mr. Gunn. You're getting tangled up in the Lizard's business, you say? Even if by proxy, you'd better watch your back, love." She took a pull at her drink, and lit another cigarette.

[Sgt.Major Thistlewaite]

"Call me Tommy, sweetheart- Mr. Gunn's my dad." He grimaces, then says, "Lemme tell ya a little story, love." He pauses, and lights another cigarette, blows a perfect smoke ring (which eventually settles like a halo above Clark's metallic nob) and continues, " Mr. Lawrence Livermore Lipschitz and I have a history. I pounded a flatfoot beat in the Riverfront district, uniform cop, for 12 years. Then I made detective, 7 years there, and I started gettin' hints that Mr. Lipschitz, while remaining the darling of High Society, wasn't above hiring low-life thugs and goons to grease the wheels when a deal wasn't goin' his way. He owns a lot of properties down in the Warehouse and Riverfront neighborhoods, and unprofitable ones have a funny habit of burning down. I started lookin' in his direction a little too hard, and, to make a long story short, after he'd bankrolled the new Mayor's campaign, Hissoner appointed a new Police Commisioner, the progressive Mr. Barnard Fivendiemer. The new commish called me in, told me I was a "dinosaur" and a "Neanderthal", said the modern police force didn't tolerate my kind anymore, and had me turn in my shield and my service revolver right then and there! One year short of a pension, 19 years of serving the public interest, and all off a sudden, I'm out on my ass!" He takes a gulp of his Bourbon, and a long drag off the cigarette, exhaling a cloud of smoke. "Yeah, I already know about tickin' off Lippy the Lizard." He gazes into his glass for a moment. "Still got a few pals down at City Hall, though. When I put in for the P.I. license, they rubber-stamped it on the QT. Now I'm tryin to nail the Lizard on insurance fraud. Oh yeah, doll, be careful who ya let hear ya call him Lippy the Lizard...goes without sayin' he ain't fond of that moniker."

[Captain Brandsson]

The sudden clap of thunder as I arrived at my destination nearly busted my eardrums and gravity slammed me to the floor now that it had a better grip; but after where I just got out of feeling anything, even pain, was a relief.
I lay on the floor coughing up seawater, struggling to breathe while I fought back the usual nausea.
Time travel may have paid for lunch, but it sometimes made me feel like I was about to lose it.
My clothes squelched wetly as I manged to turn and look around...  Did I just roll over a fish?
When I saw where I was...  when I was...  I had to laugh.
"Hey doll, sorry about the koi pond in the middle of the floor.  Can I get a bottle of bourbon and a pack of Luckies?"
As I stood up, I heard the clink and scrape of metal.  Looking down and saw I was still chained to the lead weight.
"And a hacksaw..."
I checked my pockets.  I still had my gun but my wallet got left 30,000 years in the past.
"You're gonna need to put them on my tab."

[The Abiliegh]

Listening intently, she finished both her drink and her cigarette. "Whether or not he likes it, it's pretty common to hear it, 'round these parts. Couple of his boys tried to shake me down a while back. Would have gotten away with it to, if it weren't for a few different bits of luck that the world had me owed, far as I see it." Something in her tone of voice made it pretty clear that there was more to the story than she was letting on. Something else said that not everything she was hiding was upsetting.

"It's downright rotten what they did to ya downtown. Gets me all riled up, how dirty this city is. There's never a break for honest folk." She looked about to say soemthing further when the loud commotion and spash of water drew everyone's attention.

"You're not capable of just walkin in through a door like everybody else, are ya?" She sighed audibly. As strange as the situation was, Mrs Cross seemed admiribly unphased. "You're cleaning this mess up once I spring you from that hunk o' scrap."

She knelt and rummaged a bit beneath the bar, soon placing a hacksaw on the counter. "Tommy, if you'll excuse me a moment..." Her smile was apologetic. "And Clark, a drink for everyone, on the house. Apologies for the comotion... and the water..." the last was said nearly under her breath as she made it through the mess, giving the man the blade.

[Honeybell]

Honey looked up from her drink at the direction of the commotion only to see Mrs. Cross handing a poor, soaking man a hacksaw.  Musing to herself she commented, "I believe I've had days like that."  She accepted with gratitude the free drink from Clark and whispered to the clockwork man.

"Please send the gentleman your best with my regards."

[The Abiliegh]

Clark looks between the two men in the bar. "Which one, miss?"

[Honeybell]

"The soggy one, my good uhm sir."  Honey replied chagrined.

[The Abiliegh]

Clark nods and rattles off, taking the long way around the water and back to the bar to make the remaining drinks.

[Captain Brandsson]

"You're not capable of just walkin in through a door like everybody else, are ya?"

"I was thrown through that window.  Both times."
This was one dame who knew how to hold a grudge.
I started to cut myself loose.
"So...  Fish and chips for dinner, tonight?  I think that one over there is extinct, now, so the cavemen must have loved 'em."

"The soggy one, my good uhm sir."  Honey replied chagrined.

Clark nods and rattles off, taking the long way around the water and back to the bar to make the remaining drinks.

"Thanks, Rusty."  I rasied my glass to the generous blonde "And you, Miss.  I'll join you for another as soon as I... uh... Am free."

[The Abiliegh]

"You're not capable of just walkin in through a door like everybody else, are ya?"

"I was thrown through that window.  Both times."
This was one dame who knew how to hold a grudge.
I started to cut myself loose.
"So...  Fish and chips for dinner, tonight?  I think that one over there is extinct, now, so the cavemen must have loved 'em."

"The soggy one, my good uhm sir."  Honey replied chagrined.

Clark nods and rattles off, taking the long way around the water and back to the bar to make the remaining drinks.

"Thanks, Rusty."  I rasied my glass to the generous blonde "And you, Miss.  I'll join you for another as soon as I... uh... Am free."

"Which wont be for a bit yet, if you don't hold still." She was trying to get at the chain, and batting at his leg.

[Captain Brandsson]

"Which wont be for a bit yet, if you don't hold still." She was trying to get at the chain, and batting at his leg.

"It's like Cairo, all over again...  Well, minus the mechanical tiger."

[Sgt.Major Thistlewaite]

Suddenly, it sounded like a bomb went off in the bar. Tommy felt the overpressure on his ears, rolled off the bar stool and onto his feet, knocking over his drink, the big Colt appearing in his right hand as if by magic. "Holy Jumpin' Catfish!" he exclaimed. The sight that greets his eyes is one for which he's totally unprepared..there's a fella on his back in the middle of the floor, sopping wet, and a couple of fish and a big puddle of water and seaweed around him. He's seen a lot of strange things before, but this bar has 'em all beat hollow. Whiskey machine, clockwork barkeep, and now a guy blasting in apparently out of thin air...
Suddenly, he hollers as a sharp pain stings the fingers of his left hand...while he was staring open-mouthed at the guy in the middle of the floor, his Camel had burned down to his fingers. He drops the butt on the floor, stubs it out with his wingtip shoe, then pulls the pack out of his pocket and extracts another. As he thumbs the Zippo to life, he notices his hand is shaking a little. "Man," he thinks, "This place is weird!!" He puts the big automatic back in the shoulder holster, as Mrs. Cross brings a hacksaw for the mug on the floor. T.E. notices then that the fella's chained to a sizable lead weight. "Weird," he thinks, "and getting stranger all the time." Clark calmly replaces his drink. What's even more odd is how unfrazzled by all this everyone else appears to be..like they're used to this sort of thing. "What kind of place have I stumbled into?" wonders Tommy. "Trouble.." He uprights the bar stool, and takes a long pull off his fresh drink. "Well, the 'T' in 'T.E.' stands for Trouble"...his inner voice doesn't sound convincing even to him.

[Honeybell]

Honey finds herself shaking her head regretfully at the clock.  "Perhaps another time dear sir,"  she says to the man with Mrs. Cross wrapped around his leg. 
"My ride is departing so I must as well."
She pays the clockwork man behind the counter and says to Mrs. Cross, "You enjoy your time off, you earned it today hun."
Turning, Honey nods to the detective, then slips quietly out the door.

[Captain Brandsson]

I'd travelled 30,000 years in time and still arrived late. 
Why couldn't it have been 29,999 years, 364 days and 23 hours?